We are sharing ONE month of what our curriculum looks like.  Lets break it down:

  • An emotion focus once a month
  • Definition of the emotion
  • How to bring that emotion into an adoption conversation
  • Mental health tip written by on of our contributors, Beth Steffen, a licensed counselor
  • Journal prompts for the journal that the women should receive when they attend group for their first time
  • There will also be additional resources including an exclusive video library.

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February - GRIEF

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noun

1.keen mental suffering or distress over affliction or loss; sharp sorrow;

painful regret.

How to bring GRIEF into your adoption discussions:  Grief is not something we choose.  It is an unavoidable experience when loss has occurred.  People have a hard time understanding our grief because “we chose this”.  We broke our own hearts so we should just be able to accept it and move on, right?  Absolutely not.  If you are not grieving you are not feeling and if you are not feeling you are numbing yourself in destructive ways that will stunt your healing and forward movement.  Grief is normal, grief looks different for every single birth mother and there is NO time frame for how long this great and complex ambiguous loss effects you.  You will experience different levels of grief, I believe, for the rest of your life.  It will come and go, get better or worse…but it will always be there, and in unexpected ways you will be triggered by it.  A song, a smell, a sound…it can take you back in a second.  DO NOT ignore the grief.  You need to learn to co-exist with the grief while continuing to take those empowered steps forward. 

Mental health tip:

 Steps to Overcoming Grief:

  1. Acknowledge your pain, it is okay to have pain.
  2. Accept that grief can (and will) trigger different and unexpected emotions.
  3. Understand that your grieving process will be unique to you.  No one else will grieve the same way you do.
  4. Seek out face-to-face support from people who care about you.
  5. Take care of yourself physically so you can support yourself emotionally.

 

Journal prompt:

 What steps are you taking to rebuild around your grief?

In what ways can you "learn to live" with your grief?

How can you honor your grief while you experience it?